I’ve been tagged by 3 people, Liz, Alec, and Heidi, to participate in the “7 things you didn’t know about me” meme. Well, here it is… sort of…

1. I’ll start with a confession: I hate memes! As I openly admitted here, I was never really good at doing ‘assignments’ and this blog has never felt like that to me. I’ve thought about this post for days and couldn’t get my butt in front of the computer to write it because it felt contrived. Even when I last wrote a meme I sort of cheated and just printed something I’d already written, (my grandfather’s eulogy to be specific). So, the fact is that you won’t see me write too many of these. -Glad that’s out of the way!

2. I have bouts of insomnia. I’ll be fine for three to six months then I get hit with it. I’ll live off of 3-4 hours sleep for 5 or 6 days, then catch up with a 6 or 7 hour night, and then go another 5-6 days on less than 4 hours sleep. Even when insomnia isn’t hitting me I tend to need very little sleep. I slept in this morning and tonight, if all goes as planned, I will probably get 3hrs sleep. When people tell me, “You are killing yourself”, I usually respond with, ‘I might die younger than you, but I’ll be awake longer than you were.’ Oh and for no rhyme or reason sometimes I can drink coffee and then go right to bed, sometimes it wires me awake for hours, and the same holds true for medicines that are supposed to cause drowsiness.

3. I am not Tech Savvy! If I had a pair of dimes for every time someone said, ‘Dave, you are good with computers, can you help me with this…” then I could retire early. I’ll explain this with a tangent example: The fact is that I happen to be a very good driver. Put me behind the wheel of a car, even in a snow storm, and I’ll get you to your destination safely. However, don’t ask me to do anything more to the car than put gas or windshield washer fluid in it… maybe check the tire pressure… that’s it! Give me a working computer and I can do pretty good there too! Not because I’m savvy though… just because I spend hours trying things… see #2 above.

4. I’ve never owned a car. Both cars we currently have are in my wife’s name.

5. I’m am inventor. I commuted on my bicycle when I first moved to BC and I designed my own commuter bag. It was the first time I’d ever had something made that I designed and other than being a bit too small it turned out great!

From ’03 to ’05 I dedicated thousands of hours and created a patent for bicycle locks that connect together. At over 140 pages, 90 or so drawings (many requiring pixel-by-pixel adjustments), not to mention about $15,000, this was a huge undertaking! I flew to Boston to pitch my idea and a patent specialist at Kryptonite Locks liked it… But I pitched it to them just after this happened… their money was a bit tied up to be toying with a specialty lock. I also pitched it in my own back yard at Norco Bikes. They wanted it, but could not convince their foreign lock-maker to make it for them… a long story and moot after The World Patent Office rejected my international patent request because they thought my idea wasn’t ‘novel’ enough. This, despite two industry specialists liking it and finding it novel! I decided not to fight it and throw good money after bad, but I’m really proud of taking this as far as I did.

My ideas mostly come during my bouts of insomnia, when my mind won’t rest. I remember seeing Phenomena with John Travolta and in it there is a scene where he describes random ideas flooding his brain, like shortening the mailman’s route pattern and changing the layout of a parking lot to fit more cars. I really connect to what that feels like. I’ve fully developed ideas in my head for bike lights, an alarm clock and bed sheets… who in their right mind tries to revolutionize the design of bed sheets?

6. I was a Treasure Hunter! Some of my closest friends don’t know this… they thought I was doing ‘mineral exploration’… (this wasn’t really a lie). We never found any treasures, but we found some very interesting holes in some very remote places. Basically we always got there too late!

My adventures included: Nights under remote skies where Magellanic Clouds could be seen with my naked eye; Fishing in waist high water, catching barracuda and tying them to a rope attached to my leg -later on that evening called ‘bait’, when I found out that I was in shark-infested waters; An out-of-body experience, alone on spit facing the Atlantic Ocean with a storm passing by; Hiking a desert mountain only to be hailed on in a freak lightning storm- we had no choice but to take shelter under a tree to avoid welts from the marble sized hail… 20 minutes later we were sweating in blistering heat; Suffering from ‘mask squeeze’ on a 75 foot wall dive (my first dive ever)-I was relieving my ear pressure, but not the pressure in my mask and I ended up with the whites of my eyes almost completely red. Being bitten by over 30 wasps in a cave on a tropical island; Not being bitten by a 4 foot rattle snake I almost walked right into near the Superstitious Mountains; Dragging a boat for over an hour through methane-rich muck because low tide prevented us from lowering the motor; Spending 24,000 kilometers in a Jeep Cherokee in one summer… that’s 10 full days calculated at an unrealistic 100km/hr average; Thousands of false beeps on metal detectors and ground-probing radar; Too many holes dug; Watching the tide change in the Bay of Fundy; Horizon-less fog; Mesmerizing dust devils; Unbelievable hikes; Incredible sunsets; And fond memories to last a lifetime.

7. You didn’t really expect me to follow the rules did you? I’m done. And since I don’t like doing these, I won’t pass this on to anyone. If I’ve inspired you to share, leave a comment with a link and I’ll add my own link below this to give you some link-love.

So I dedicate this post, (my portion of my Papa’s eulogy), to my grandfather, Leon Bernstein, March 24th, 1924 – December 4th, 2000. He really is the best role model for success that I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.

Like many of you, I know this because he told me so.
Papa wasn’t boasting when he said this, he was just
telling you the way it is. If you were to measure a
man by the legacy he leaves behind Papa would come as
big as they get. In this way he is still a giant and
always will be.

Five children, 13 grandchildren, and a growing number
of great grandchildren, currently at 5 and a half,
make quite a legacy for Papa and Granny. Papa called
his great grandkids his Third Crop. Just on Sunday he
told me, “Boy, if I knew my Third Crop was going to be
this much fun, I would have had them first.”

We all miss Leon Bernstein, Mr. B., Dad, or Papa. But
our lives are so much richer from knowing him. Like
many of you here, I never really thought of living
without him in my life before now. Yet, I feel sorry
not so much for us, but for his Third Crop, for my
daughter, who will not get to know him. I speak to you
today to share with you some of the wisdom Papa has
taught me: some wisdom that needs to be passed on to
Papa’s Third Crop.

So here are some lessons or rules that Papa lived by,
rules that made him the Giant we all know.

Rule #1
“Don’t wait for it to completely break before you fix it.”
Papa would walk into your house and see a loose tile
in the kitchen. Two days later, he would show up with
his tools and mend it before it became a problem.
There is an old saying that says, “Kill a snake when
it is small”. Papa never had to deal with large
snakes.

Rule #2
“Stuff happens, just move on.”
Papa never dwelled on bad things, he would just move
on and, “Call that Wally”. I can not remember Papa
being mad for more than five minutes. He knew there
were much more important things to focus on. Like his
favorite sports team, or making sure everyone saw the
beautiful sunset from his balcony. Or just playing
with his grand and great grand children.

Rule #3
“Don’t waste time on stupidness.”
This rule could also be called, “I look stupid to
you?” or the “What de-yass is dat?” rule. Papa didn’t
have time for stupidity. On this topic, Papa was very
expressive. He always used his time and never wasted
it. On the same note, Papa was always fixing things
and if there was a smarter way to do things, or a
short-cut to use, Papa found it. It was usually just
after one of his time saving discoveries that Papa
beamed, and would say, “Man, Papa is a Giant!”

Rule #4
“Enjoy everything you have.”
For Papa, nothing was too small to be appreciated. He
made it an art to celebrate the little things in life.
From his morning coffee and jumble puzzle to a
handmade birthday card from a grandchild, Papa
appreciated all that life had to offer.

Rule #5
“Business is business and pleasure is pleasure.”
Papa had the amazing ability to put on and take off
his business cap. He never mixed the two. He had the
knack of being small town friendly and big business
savvy without ever letting one get in the way of the
other.

Rule #6
“Be small town friendly.”
I remember going to a shopping plaza early one
morning with Papa. A woman walked pass us as we got
out of the car and she said, “Good morning”. Papa
replied, “Good morning,” and then said, “You’re from
the islands.” The woman stopped and looked up oddly at
Papa wanting to know why he thought she was from the
islands? Papa replied, “Because you said good morning,
in a big city like this, people don’t talk to
strangers in parking lots”. Turns out she was from
Trinidad. Papa loved to get to know people. From a
sales clerk, to a door attendant, to a doctor, to a
President, Papa was a magnet that people could not
help but be drawn to.

Rule #7
“Never retire.”
This is what kept Papa young and fun. He didn’t
retire…He became a tiler, a carpenter, a chauffeur, a
landlord, a banker, a fund-raiser, a board member, a
baseball coach, a plumber, a jack of all trades. He
continued to learn and to grow. He did all this
without spreading himself too thin. He did all this
keeping his family a priority, after all his main job
was as a loving husband, father, grandfather, great
grandfather, and a true friend.

Rule #8
“Smile…a lot.”
With us, his second crop, and his third crop too,
Papa could often be found, laying down on the carpet
with kids playing on and around him. His smile would
light you up. He would nap on the floor in a crowded
room, wake up and pretend to be mad for 10 seconds or
so because his grandchildren put hair ties and clips
on him. We would laugh and then you would see a glint
in Papa’s eyes and a smile that was contagious. Papa
was happiest around family and that happiness was
contagious too.

Rule #9
“Take care of your family.”
If I had to rank these rules, this would be number 1
with Papa. From fixing your toilet, to helping you at
the bank Papa was always looking out for you. As I
look around this room, I think I’d be hard pressed to
find a single person that he didn’t do more for than
they did for him. When it comes to family and friends,
he is the best role model anyone could have.

Rule #10
Always remember… “Papa is a Giant!”

Papa B’s “Crop”, July 2007. His third crop count is now 10… and will continue to grow.